Which character am I?
I’m a big fan of Jane Austen and similar authors. It all started with the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice back in high school. It just seemed that all the facets of romance were bound up in one 5 hour film. We (my like minded friends and I) all wanted to be (or at least be like) Elizabeth Bennett. Lizzy was smart, beautiful, and knew what she wanted. She who boldly stated, “Nothing but the very deepest love will ever induce me into matrimony.” It is the most perfect, idealistic relationship statement ever uttered, and as she ended up marrying Mr. Darcy in the end, it obviously worked for her. But there are lots of characters in this story and from time to time I find myself wondering just which character I really am.
Sometimes I wonder if I’m not Jane, pinning away over a miscommunication, but resolved to be happy anyway. Or maybe I’m Charlotte, not very romantic and willing to settle for a comfortable home, even if it comes with the most ridiculous man in the country. Then again, on the rare occasion I’ve displayed a certain silliness characterized in Kitty and Lydia or even the slight over piousness of Mary.
So I ran this idea past my sister a few weeks ago, and in her usual sweet logical way she said, “You’re not any of those characters, you’re you.” Or course she’s right, and I’m glad. I really wouldn’t want to actually be any of those ladies anyway, and I wouldn’t want to marry any of the men they ended up with either, not even the famed Mr. Darcy.
As lovely as some of these characters are in theory, they are only that, theory. As a work of fiction these characters are made to portray a few facets of reality, just enough make them interesting, but not enough to make them real. On top of that, even if they were real, we would still be different, simply because we are different.
I don’t want someone else’s love story, as wonderful as it may be. No, I’m looking forward to my own, my own little drama, my own set of plot twists, my own happy ending. So here we are, none of us really knowing how our stories will end until they do. So we play our part and look forward to living happily ever after.