Regarding Squatter’s Rights?
I won’t lie, I’m in the struggle. Tonight is my last night in the beach house. My last night with my roommates of 1 1/2 years. My last night with in-home wifi/internet. The struggle is real.
Now it’s not all sad. In fact, there are a lot of real advantage to this move. It’s just hard. And hard isn’t bad. It’s just hard.
Have you seen that YouTube video of the 4 year old discussing kindergarten? No? Well check it out. Replace “kindergarten” with “New Haven” and this little girl is verbalizing my feelings right now with scary accuracy.
And that’s how I feel about living in a city.
Other times I’m super excited about it! I’m walking distance from the Green, from the Yale Art Museums, from hundreds of cute (albeit ridiculously overpriced) shops, and some of the best food on the East Coast (I’ll be literally living across from Pepe’s Pizza, which we’re told is world famous, but honestly I never heard of them until I moved to CT. Regardless, it is really good pizza).
Here’s the thing, as much as I’ve never, ever in my life had any desire to live anywhere near a downtown city area, I do recognize that there are some benefits, and I certainly plan on exploiting them this summer.
This year marks a very different season of life. I know that sounds dramatic, but it’s true. Last year I told several people that this year was going to be totally different than anything I had experienced up until that point. Mostly because it was impossible for things to remain as they were. I had reached a tipping point.
Tipping points are interesting in the sense that they bring you to a place where you’re willing to risk what you would have never imagined possible just to alleviate the pressure you’re under. You get to the point where you’re willing to let go of what was sustaining you, but at the same time holding you back.
Have you noticed that? It’s often the mediocre things that we think are the only way to survive that are keeping us from reaching out for the things that will give us the ability to thrive? It’s the picture of letting go of something to make room in your hands for what God wants to give you. That is an act of faith if ever there was one.
But this is the path God has had me on from the beginning. Let go to receive.
Just once I would love for God to hand me what I’ll be getting before I have to let go of what seems like my key to survival. Just once that would be nice. However, that hasn’t happened yet in my life, and I don’t often observe it in others. So I guess we’re just going to have to do it His way for now.
In the mean time, I’ve yet again added to the pile of my belongings languishing away in my parents basement. I’ll move into my rented room with just my clothes and my instruments. (I’ve never been sentimental over possessions or a packrat, but this is a little sparse even for me.) I’ll begin the process of adjusting to living with someone entirely different than myself. With no internet in the house, I’ll have plenty of time to do all of the reading, studying, music and life that I always complain about not having time to do.
And I’ll make it work. Like I’ve made the beach house work… and basements work… and lofts work…
Either that, or I’ll try to pull off squatter’s rights here at the beach house. I’ll let you know how that goes.